I wanted to write and tell you just how proud I am of you. You have experienced the loss of a child and I know the pain overtakes you at times but you are brave and courageous. You have walked this journey with grace and strength so far.
I know sometimes it feels like no one understands or ‘gets it’, they are trying but sometimes it just isn’t enough or what you need and that’s ok. Find people who do, there is a community out there who’s been through similar circumstances. It’s like joining a club you wished you never had to but are so thankful to discover. They understand the heartache and the pain and as you share you may just find people close to you have also experienced baby loss they have just never had anyone who ‘gets it’ either to talk to.
Don’t be afraid to feel or share your emotion. This was your baby and no matter how old they were when you lost them they are your child and will always live on as that in your heart. Allow yourself to grieve and process the pain of living without them.
Know that this was not your fault, you are not a failure. Life throws tragedy at us but as you make peace in your heart you will find strength and you will honour your baby in a way that’s right for you. The pain may fade over time but the memory will always be imprinted on your heart. Cuts heal but scars are left as a constant reminder. You can either see it as defeat or as a badge of honour.
There is no right or wrong way to ‘be’, everybody grieves, processes and reacts differently. People will have similar stories but you are unique so own your story and do what feels right for you. I know it’s hard to believe right now as you feel so numb but you will find joy again and you will start to see the world in colour again. Time heals, often slowly but hold onto that hope.
My thoughts and love are with you, know that you are not alone.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Beki is 31, mum to a heaven born baby boy and 3 girls aged 9,8&4. She is the founder of Believe in ME and creates luxury affirmation cards and gifts to support women on their journey.
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