Did you know there’s a crazy statistic floating around that says on average, by the time your child turns 18, you’ve spent 70% of the ENTIRE time you get with them in your whole life? WHAT?!
Oh, and get this one—there are only 936 Saturdays between a child’s birth and when they turn 18. Seriously?
Though, I guess, as moms we kind of already know this. The time we have with our kids is limited. You feel it every time you buy ANOTHER new pair of shoes because they outgrew the pair from last month. I feel it when they curl up on my lap and realize they fit even less than last time.
I know you want to spend as much time with them as you can because they are precious to you. But you also have dreams and goals and a mission that is something of your own. You started a business for a reason. You want to use your talents, share your passion, help your family have a better life—and be home with them too.
But, right now, it feels like these desires are at complete odds with each other. Am I right? There’s a constant tug of war happening between your home life and your business that makes it all seem too hard to manage.
I remember those days–the ones when you have piles of laundry, a sink full of dishes, and a to do list way too long; and every time you sit down to do one little thing, your kids suddenly need you—NOW!
When I had my first business I thought I was being a terrible mom. I had my kids watching tv for hours (they loved it, I didn’t) Plus I was disorganized, so I never knew EXACTLY what I needed to be doing. Which meant what little time I had was wasted in “busy work” and not on anything important. And even worse, I was trying to do All. The. Things.
To make matters worse, I never felt present doing what I was doing.
When I was with my family, I felt like I should be working on my business—how else was it supposed to grow? But, then when I worked on my business, I either felt like I needed to be with my family or it was so late at night my brain had stopped functioning and I didn’t get anything important done anyway.
I’ll never forget the beautiful spring day in May when I looked down at my phone, just about time for school pick up, and saw a message from my daughter’s friend’s mom saying she was at the school and wondered if K could come home with her for a play date.
I was confused, because she sent it more than an hour before school got out.
Then it hit me.
It was the Mother’s Day celebration at school and I had missed it!
Why? Because I’d been busy, and I hadn’t put it on my calendar. I was trying to run a business, and my family, and maintain relationships, and do all. the. things. And important things were forgotten.
When I got to the school my daughter didn’t even cry. But I did. I was a blubbery mess of apology. She comforted me, even though I know she was really disappointed.
I determined right then that it was never going to happen again. I was tired of feeling like I was failing by letting my family down because of my business.
But I was also conflicted, because I didn’t want to let my business down because of my family. If you’ve ever felt like this, the answer is not shut down your business or let it die. The answer is to grow and thrive like the entrepreneur you have always been meant to be.
I want to share with you a few ways to do it so it doesn’t take you as long to get there as it’s taken me.
First, remember to rely on your strengths. What are you good at? What can you do to move forward? Where do you still need to grow?
Then decide what you really want and what is most important to you now. Everything has a season and a place. You can’t do everything in the world, but you can do all that’s important to you.
Remember—everything will be ok, and those expectations you think are coming from everyone else, are usually coming from yourself.
Realize who you are! You are a strong, capable, powerful, intelligent woman. Sometimes she gets lost. Find her within yourself. Believe in her like you would your best friend, because she needs you!
Use your resources wisely—financial, physical, emotional, spiritual. You only have so much. Use them in the best way for you.
Plan for the future. What do you want next? What are your dreams? Focus on them and plan how you’re going to get there, because without a map or idea of what you want, you can never get there.
Mothering is hard. Being an entrepreneur is hard. Together it can seem impossible. But you can do it. Because the world needs you and your unique talents.
You got this!
Kirsten Reeder is a coach for mom entrepreneurs, who helps moms eliminate the stress and overwhelm of day-to-day life so they can be the awesome mom they want to be–AND grow their business too. As a mother of three, Kirsten started coaching because learned the hard way that being a mom and a running a business have to work together. Today Kirsten offers a wide range of programs and services from group coaching to workshops and speeches. To contact Kirsten, please visit her website, http://www.vibrantmomsociety.com or email her email@example.com